I have been an Intuitive Counsellor for two years now and I have grown considerably in that time. I hadn’t realised the depth of what I was taking on when I was training. I was told on my training course that if the saying is, ‘Healer; Heal thyself’ then the phrase for the person wanting to become a counsellor is ‘Counsellor; know thyself.’ It is beginning to dawn on me, that a person who has a goal of Self Realisation is going to need to know themselves and others deeply so that they can grow in their capacity to love and to understand.
That’s why I have chosen to write about one of the traits I am currently working on within myself?and that is, my desire to run before I can walk. As I mentioned, I have been in the world of counselling for a relatively short time but I got it into my head that I wanted to start holding workshops. I thought it would be a good way to find clients and maximise my time, seen as I am a mum of two boys, age 10 & 11 and time is in short supply. The only trouble was I had never run a workshop before and I was petrified.
I have, to date run four different workshops on a completely different topic s with the same group of 8 women and I have learnt a lot along the way but I made it very hard for myself. Yes, I enjoyed it ~ when I was running the workshop and yes, the attendees certainly benefitted from them but the price I paid was a lack of balance and peace within.
I have come to understand that when I am trying to run before I can walk, I’m pushing from the ego. When I am coming from ego, I am not connected and when there is no connection, there is fear. In my case, the fear of not being good enough lead me to consult books written by people who have knowledge on the subjects I had decided to include in my workshops. The problem was I couldn’t read enough because I wasn’t lacking knowledge I was deficient in trust with my connection to Divine Intelligence.
My most recent workshop was supposed to be tonight, instead I am writing this blog post because half the attendees dropped out last minute and I decided to reschedule. The workshop was going to be on fear and how to overcome it, yet secretly I was full of fear about my ability to deliver it. I was not surprised when people dropped out and I have to say, I was a little relieved.
It is as if I have finally got the lesson that working with God/Guru is never about pushing; it’s about unfolding, it’s not about putting pressure on oneself; it’s about opening up to Unconditional Love.
Next month I will be taking the Pure Meditative Peace Teacher Training Course. After that I aim to concentrate my energy on taking Pure Meditative Peace to my local community, even as I write this my whole body has shifted into a state of knowing.
I have learnt that I don’t need to run before I can walk; I just need to walk hand in hand with God/Guru. What a relief and what a blessing.